Things that might

Things that might happen if you moved to Copenhagen:

  • Three youths, strangers to each other, might meet on the boat to Stockholm and spend the night on a blanket spread out on the floor of an invalid bathroom. If they did, they would discover that one is wearing see-through panties, another is wearing red satin thongs, and that each of the three keeps their hair down there neat and trimmed.

  • You might find yourself in the cafeteria of an alternative high school on a Friday afternoon. The place might be full of adolescents drinking beer and rolling joints. Perhaps the place is thick with smoke. You might be looking for a piercing artist that you’ve never seen and who’s name you don’t know. If you were to find him, you might watch you sister go into the cafeteria kitchen and return an hour later, a dazed look on her face. Perhaps you, also, might go into the kitchen, hop up on the stainless steel counter and leave with a bloody nipple and a brand new 12 gauge ring dangling from it.

  • You might spend hours and hours alone, walking in the city or sitting in front a computer propped up on five beer crates stolen in the night from the street in front of a neighborhood store. Perhaps you learn that it quite possible to get drunk alone, while writing and smoking the darkness away. This realization might be both satisfying and scary.

  • Christiania and a sister who likes smoking marijuana more than drinking may turn out to be a bad combination. If this happens, you might learn to say no. You may also start an endless argument with your sister about which is worse: your impending alcoholism or her imminent brain death from pot consumption.

  • Your twisted compulsion to flirt without intention might really get out of hand. This is might become a serious problem.

  • You might, on occasion, eat dried magic mushrooms which taste like dog shit, and learn that rolling around on the floor is fun. In addition, it is possible that your legs will be swept out from under you—even while you’re sitting. This will seem like a very enlightening experience.

  • You might stop shaving altogether and start thinking that people avoid you on the street because you look like a crazy person. You might start thinking that you are one.

  • You might live in an apartment where the shower drain stops up and you have to use beer crates as stepping stones so your feet don’t get wet. You might never see your neighbors. You might receive mail addressed to six different people—even on Saturdays, since this is Denmark.

  • You might realise that though it is hard to write while living, it is infinitely harder to write without living. Friends and family and a job may be distractions, but then again, maybe distractions are necessary.

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